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I've
never extended a public thanks to our liberals in the country,
people like Martin Sheen and anchorwoman Carole Simpson, for
what they and their comrades have done for us. I would
like to correct that, lest we forget what their contribution has
meant to us.
President
George W. Bush has been in office less than 30 days, and Ms.
Simpson would infer that we now have an enormous population of
homeless people. Of course, economists know that the
slowdown started approximately March-April of Y2K, when the
liberals had control of the White House, but without the
liberals we wouldn't realize how many people President Bush
could impoverish in less than 30 days in office. I feel we
should congratulate them on their insightful analysis of the
power of a new president whom they dislike.
Without
Martin Sheen's comments on President Bush's lack of
intelligence, we would be totally unaware that the nation is now
being run in a highly businesslike fashion by "a clown .. a
moron." The military personnel who greeted President
Bush apparently didn't realize that he is ... err... what's the
PC term ... intellectually challenged as they thronged to give
their hurrahs to this enemy of the people. I am now
wondering about the intellectual capabilities of veteran
journalist Paul Harvey, who recounted Dubya's prowess as an
F-102 pilot in 1969. Well, we have to take the word of a
Hollywood liberal over that of a conservative journalist ...
that makes sense, so we extend thanks to the liberals for
spreading more asinine behavior around the globe. Without
liberals, we could rise to the heights of self-respect ... in
fact, that's just where President Bush is taking us!
Of
course, we have to thank the liberals, and the immediate
past-president in particular, for reminding us that they were
responsible for the 1990's prosperity that was actually put in
motion by former President Ronald Reagan and entrepreneurs like
Gordon Earle Moore, the founder of Intel, and Bill Gates of
Microsoft. And let us not forget that liberal Al Gore was
responsible for the Internet, lest we deny the liberals the
credibility of all their lies.
We
have the Hollywood liberals to thank for the fact that freedom
of speech has been carried far beyond the boundaries of common
sense and common decency, that profanity is all over the media,
and that films like "Hannibal" can smash box office
records for revenue. We have lowered the standards below
anything imaginable when Americans will give up good money to
watch someone eating "finger lickin' good" ... err ...
people. However, if some kids come up with the idea that a
classmate will make a tasty lunch or dinner ... the outcry will
be against the damned conservatives who didn't want total gun
control. That's just good liberal logic!
We
have the liberals to thank for teaching us, via the National
Endowment for the Arts, that manure on a statue of the Virgin
Mary is art, and we have to express our gratitude to these
imaginative liberals who hold nothing sacred and everything in
contempt. We need to thank the skinny California vegans
who love owls and trees more than electric power plants, because
they have caused romantic rolling blackouts over the state and
kept their pristine wilderness areas safe from the industry that
under girds their state and the nation as well as their
occupation or welfare. May we never vote them off the
continent, lest we return to sane art and sane industrial
planning.
Of
course, I am extremely thankful to the liberals for teaching our
kids that the government can raise them in better fashion than
parents; that if you have enough liberal money behind you, you
can get by with all manner of immoral or illegal conduct and buy
your way out; that it's okay to have sex outside of marriage
even if you are allegedly a Baptist minister giving moral
counsel to a president in trouble for womanizing; and further
for allowing homosexuality to be considered as an alternative
lifestyle in spite of the deadly effects of AIDS.
I
am so sorry I overlooked this belated "thank you" to
the liberals. <SIGH>
Hopefully,
this corrects the oversight.
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